Before The Throne of God Above

Recently a dear friend and I were in deep discussion about life. Sometimes discussions of life can be relatively carefree and easy, but this wasn't one of those discussions. This one started off light, but it was clear, shortly after our conversation started, that we were going to delve into a very deep discussion about life, its ups and downs and where on the path we can sometimes feel overwhelmed. We both are deep thinkers so it is sometimes interesting to see where our conversations lead when we start with something simple. Funny how that happens over coffee on a rainy afternoon.

My friend was excited to share a song with me that day. She has mentioned this song to me before, but I really didn't pay much attention to it. Perhaps it was the mood I was in that day or just the gentle Holy Spirit leading me to this song. It's actually an old hymn written by a woman named Charitie Bancroft. The song is "Before the Throne of God Above". It has been recorded and re-recorded recently by several big Christian names like Sonic Flood, Shane & Shane and Selah. Like I said, I never paid much attention to it. I took the sheet music from her, said thank you, kissed her on her cheek as friends do when parting, and we parted.

Over the last several days, my thoughts have been brought back to this song several times. So, tonight I decided to look it up online and see why I was being pulled into this song. It wasn't long into reading this that I began to cry. I knew exactly why my gentle Papa God was trying to get my attention with this song after hearing it and reading the first two stanzas of the hymn.

"Before the throne of God above I have a strong, a perfect plea. A great High Priest whose name is Love Who ever lives and pleads for me. When Satan tempts me to despair and tells me of the guilt within Upward I look and see Him there who made an end to all my sin".

Over the last several weeks, I have been struggling with the past. I admire people who can say, "the past is the past and I like to leave it there". I admire them; I'm envious of them and I'm a little annoyed by people who can say that and mean it. I can't do that. I'm not so much of a grudge holder, but more of a past dweller - I dwell on the mistakes I've made in the past, and I become "stuck" - stuck in the mire; stuck in the thistles and thorns. That's where I've been for the last several weeks. My friend had no way of knowing that when recommending this song to me. We hadn't talked about it. I hadn't hinted about this struggle but thank God she listens to the gentle wooing of the Holy Spirit! What a tremendous reminder for me that I don't have to be a "past" dweller. I can live in the moment, in the moment of grace I've been given, and joy can be my constant companion because of it. I have a great High Priest whose name is Love - and He ever lives and pleads for me. He has removed my sin as far as the east is from the west - no stop in between.

I often have too much going on in my head to stop and listen for the wooing of the Holy Spirit or the gentle leading of my Papa God, but thank God that He has given me friends who do....friends who pause and take what they hear in that pause. My friend will never know how much it meant to me to receive 3 pieces of paper stapled together. I can't put it so much into words. What I can say is that this song touched my heart and helped me move out of the muck and mire of the past. I don't know for how long, but I know that joy has returned, and it feels good to know my soul is counted free for God the just is satisfied with me.