Odd News On the Internet

It's too early for me to be up. It's 5:08 am, and I've actually been up since about 4:30. Sometimes I just can't sleep anymore...so, now, I'm reading "odd news" on the Internet. Have you ever done that? Here are some of the greatest breaking news stories we have to choose from today:

1. "Antartica base gets 16,500 condoms before darkness" - Apparently a research base in Antartica is preparing for winter. I don't know about you, but what I've read about winter hibernation is that it might be better to stock up on food....just a thought.

2. "Mobile ban for Singapore toilet peeping Tom" - Ok. Seriously? What has our world come to that people take their cameraphone into a bathroom. I don't know about you, but there is nothing I want to film that goes on in the bathroom. Nothing. The best part is, that the 19 year man who was charged with this actually has to do community service....Great. Sentence him to time in more public restrooms. Brilliant.

3. "Man Feels Fine After Being Shot in Head by Nailgun" - Now, I'm a tool girl. I love tools, especially power ones. But, seriously, I know not to aim a nail gun at my head. What were you thinking? Do you ever just want to scream that? The man and his friend were working on a backyard project. Isn't that how it always starts? The "backyard project". Again, nail gun - just like a real gun - unless you're planning on seeing Jesus today, you don't point it at your head. Last I checked, it was better to point it at something you were going to put a nail in.

4. "Things Get Ugly at the Gas Pumps" - A California doctor was arrested because he was angry while waiting to get gas at a Costco gas station. He pulls out a tire iron and goes after someone. Here's my favorite part ...wait for it...the police charge him with brandishing a deadly weapon in a "rude, angry or threatening manner". Umm. Is there a way to brandish a deadly weapon other than in a rude, angry, threatening manner? Isn't that the purpose of brandishing a weapon - to be rude, angry and threatening? I like the instincts of the "other driver". He locked himself in the car. Wouldn't you?

And the winner is....#5 - "Conn. Police Find Pipe Bomb Stuffed Inside Chicken"...Yep. A chicken. Now people have resorted to blowing up innocent poultry. Someone in Connecticut actually took the time to expose themselves to salmonella poisoning by touching raw chicken to put a pipe bomb inside the chicken. Then, took the time to drive the "stuffed poultry" to a nearby highway and leave it there. Motorists, driving by, actually reported the chicken by the side of the road to the police. Who reports this stuff? I don't think that I would think twice about a raw roasting chicken sitting by the side of the road. I want to know who actually would report this to the police? Imagine the 9-1-1 call "Hello. 9-1-1 Operator Here". "Um, yeah, My name is Observant Motorist, and I'm calling to report that there is a suspicious looking raw roasting chicken by the side of highway 105. I believe that it looks dangerous". Seriously. Is your name McGyver? Then, after the 9-1-1 call to come take a look at the suspicious chicken, the police closed the highway so the bomb squad could come and "blow up the chicken". I'm just glad that Colonel Sanders did not live to see this day. Such tragedies....such news...I need to get more sleep. Really, I do.