Today the enemy has had a hay day with me. I know that might sound like Pentecostal crazy talk, but the truth of the matter is this, I have let him have a stronghold on me today, and it's been difficult to shake. What is it that he has me so held by? Shame. I struggle with shamefulness. Today, I am struggling with the thought that He has cast my sins and past as far as the east is from the west...never to meet. It's not a great place to be, and I have to admit, out loud (well, blogged out loud) that I have let the enemy have that stronghold in my life today.

Have you ever had a stronghold that you think you have conquered, and out of the blue, or, as I like to say, out of the pits of hell, this stronghold knocks you right on your hiney - winds you - takes you out of the game for a day or two? Everyone's stronghold is different. Mine is shame. The enemy uses my past to remind me that it has been accompanied by shame. Today, the enemy took me out of the game by bringing me to a place I haven't been in a long time. He brought me to the bitter river of shame.

I think David must have struggled with this same stronghold from time to time. In Psalms 25:20, David prays "O keep my soul, and deliver me: let me not be ashamed; for I put my trust in thee". How interesting it is that David says that - that he says "for I put my trust in thee". Why did he use "trust" here? He could have easily said, "for I put my past in thee" - He could have put anything there, but he chose to say "trust". It's purposeful. It's truth - My feeling of shame comes from the weakness of flesh - whether or mine or others. The only way to overcome the weakness of flesh is to trust that God is in charge. Trust that He will wash away the sins. Trust that He holds me in His very care. I believe that is why David chose the word "trust" after talking about deliverance from shame. He was acknowledging that shame comes from weakness of flesh, and weakness of flesh is only overcome by the full onset of trust with God. Trust that He has removed the shame as far as the east is from the west.

With that, I say, "get thee behind me Satan"...I am a daughter of the Creator of the Universe....He shed His blood to cover all of my sin and shame. I choose to put this behind me and move on....putting my trust in God that He has done what He said He would do.

Phew. I feel better now. What a day it has been, but tomorrow is a new day. Full of new grace and truth that He is in charge. What a great reminder.