Dwelling in Fear and Anxiety

I have been watching with a bit of anxiety the financial despair that has happened in our Country over the last several weeks. I found myself waking early and staying up late because I was holding on to my worry and fear about what is going on in our economy. I can say verbally that I trust in God but my worry, anxiety and fear over the situation tell a different story.

I do not believe that God is disappointed when I'm full of worry, fear or anxiety. I think that, in his Sovereignty, He knows me. He knows the inner parts of my being. Thus, He knows that I am one to worry, fear and be anxious about things. He is not disappointed that I have those feelings, but I know, in my heart, that He does not wish me to dwell there. It's easy for me to acknowledge that I have those feelings - that I am worried about things. I know the Scripture to be anxious for nothing. However, the fact that I've memorized the Scripture in my head has nothing to do with whether or not I've applied it to my heart. Isn't that the truth about a lot of Scripture? We have it in our head. We memorized it as children. We quote it, sometimes in condemnation of others...and yet, our hearts do not believe it.

If I were to label what I'm feeling (other than worry, fear or anxiety), I would have to say that I am feeling like things around me are out of my control. And they are. That's the truth. However, a piece of me still wants to hang on to what I can control. When I get like this, I have to go back to the Psalms in Scripture. Some people might think that this is the "milky" part of Scripture reading. Personally, I find the Psalms comforting, inspiring, and they often bring me back to "grounding" - back to the path; out of the darkness of myself. I particularly like Psalms 46 - verses 1-3 - God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. Selah. The "Selah" part of that verse, for me, is when I can take a breath - when I can breathe again without feeling the fear and anxiety; without feeling like I need to hold onto my life with a death grip. It's the part of me that takes a deep breath, looks to the heavens and tells my loving Jehovah that I'm am nothing without Him....and I cannot control the whirlwind around me. Only He can calm the raging seas of our lives. Only He can take what we cannot control and allow us to do what He wants us to do - breathe, rest, sigh, be at peace.

Over the course of the last few weeks, I have had many discussions with people about our Country and where we are headed. Most of the church circle that I'm in would disagree with me (politically), but we agree as the Christ body - He is in control. God is in control of the storms around us. I know that I'm not the only one feeling the fear and anxiety. To those others, I offer the comfort of Psalms 46. Though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, continuing to verse 7 - The Lord Almighty is with us and the God of Jacob is our fortress. Rest in the knowledge that our God knows, sees and understands our fear and anxiety, but He does not want us to dwell there....brief visits....no dwelling.